Elephant friday
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A: "Look, a herd of elephants in the distance"
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses
A: Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?
A: "Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!"
Q: What do the Elephants say when they see Tarzan coming?
A: "Look - hear comes Tarzan!"
Q: What do the Elephants say when they see a French teacher coming?
A: Nothing silly, everyone knows that Elephants can't speak French!
Q: What is the difference between en elephant and a blueberry?
A: An elephant is grey.
Q: What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A: "Look! A herd of blueberries in the distance" (Bet you did not know Jane is colour blind)
Q: How many elephants can you fit in a Volkswagon?
A: Five. Two in the front, two in the back, one in the glove compartment.
Q: What game do five elephants in a Volkswagon play?
A: Squash
Q: How do you get an elephant into the fridge?
Open door.
Insert elephant.
Close door.
Q: How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
Open door.
Remove elephant.
Insert giraffe.
Close door.
Q. The lion, the king of the jungle, decided to have a party. He invited all the animals in the jungle, and they all came except one. Which one?
A. The giraffe, because he was still in the fridge.
Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your fridge?
A: The door won't close.
Q: How do you know there are three elephants in your fridge?
A: There'll be two waiting outside in the Volkswagon.
Q: How can you tell that an elephant has been in your fridge?
A: By the footprints in the butter.
Q: How do you get an elephant out of the water?
A: Wet.
Q: How do you get two elephants out of the water?
A: One by one.
Q: Why do elephants wear shoes with yellow soles?
A: So you don't see them when they float upside down in a lemon meringue pie.
Q: Have you ever seen an elephant floating upside down in a lemon meringue pie?
A: No, of course not... see?
Q: Why do elephants live in herds?
A: To get a wholesale price break on the shoes with yellow soles.
Q: How do you smuggle an elephant across the border?
A: Put a slice of bread on each side, and call him "lunch".
Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: Squeeze his trunk till he turns blue, and shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
A: When have you ever seen a yellow elephant?!!!
Q: Why did the elephant paint his balls red?
A: So he could hide in the cherry trees.
Q: How did Tarzan die?
A: Picking cherries.
Q: Why are elephants wrinkled?
A: Have you ever tried to iron one?
Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It thought it was a game.
Q: And why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.
Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: Chicken's day off.
Q: Why are there so many elephants running around free in the jungle?
A: The fridges aren't large enough to hold them all.
Q: How many elephants can you actually put in a fridge?
A: How many elephants you got?
Q: What did the fifth elephant in the VW discover?
A: The sun roof.
Q: How many elephants does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Don't be stupid, elephants like staying in the dark and don't mind being dim.
Q: How do you make a dead elephant float?
A: Well, you take 10 dead elephants, 10 tons of chocolate ice-cream, 5 tons of bananas,.....
A: "Look, a herd of elephants in the distance"
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses
A: Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.
Q: What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?
A: "Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!"
Q: What do the Elephants say when they see Tarzan coming?
A: "Look - hear comes Tarzan!"
Q: What do the Elephants say when they see a French teacher coming?
A: Nothing silly, everyone knows that Elephants can't speak French!
Q: What is the difference between en elephant and a blueberry?
A: An elephant is grey.
Q: What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A: "Look! A herd of blueberries in the distance" (Bet you did not know Jane is colour blind)
Q: How many elephants can you fit in a Volkswagon?
A: Five. Two in the front, two in the back, one in the glove compartment.
Q: What game do five elephants in a Volkswagon play?
A: Squash
Q: How do you get an elephant into the fridge?
Open door.
Insert elephant.
Close door.
Q: How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
Open door.
Remove elephant.
Insert giraffe.
Close door.
Q. The lion, the king of the jungle, decided to have a party. He invited all the animals in the jungle, and they all came except one. Which one?
A. The giraffe, because he was still in the fridge.
Q: How do you know there are two elephants in your fridge?
A: The door won't close.
Q: How do you know there are three elephants in your fridge?
A: There'll be two waiting outside in the Volkswagon.
Q: How can you tell that an elephant has been in your fridge?
A: By the footprints in the butter.
Q: How do you get an elephant out of the water?
A: Wet.
Q: How do you get two elephants out of the water?
A: One by one.
Q: Why do elephants wear shoes with yellow soles?
A: So you don't see them when they float upside down in a lemon meringue pie.
Q: Have you ever seen an elephant floating upside down in a lemon meringue pie?
A: No, of course not... see?
Q: Why do elephants live in herds?
A: To get a wholesale price break on the shoes with yellow soles.
Q: How do you smuggle an elephant across the border?
A: Put a slice of bread on each side, and call him "lunch".
Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant?
A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
Q: How do you shoot a red elephant?
A: Squeeze his trunk till he turns blue, and shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant?
A: When have you ever seen a yellow elephant?!!!
Q: Why did the elephant paint his balls red?
A: So he could hide in the cherry trees.
Q: How did Tarzan die?
A: Picking cherries.
Q: Why are elephants wrinkled?
A: Have you ever tried to iron one?
Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It was glued to the first one.
Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree?
A: It thought it was a game.
Q: And why did the tree fall down?
A: It thought it was an elephant.
Q: Why did the elephant cross the road?
A: Chicken's day off.
Q: Why are there so many elephants running around free in the jungle?
A: The fridges aren't large enough to hold them all.
Q: How many elephants can you actually put in a fridge?
A: How many elephants you got?
Q: What did the fifth elephant in the VW discover?
A: The sun roof.
Q: How many elephants does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Don't be stupid, elephants like staying in the dark and don't mind being dim.
Q: How do you make a dead elephant float?
A: Well, you take 10 dead elephants, 10 tons of chocolate ice-cream, 5 tons of bananas,.....
posted by Winter at
10:17 AM
1 Comments
